When I Iook into my child’s eyes I know I am blessed to be a mother. I also know that some women struggle with fertility, but are too afraid to talk about it.

It seems that in recent years, infertility issues have become very common and thanks to advance medical treatments, women have more options when it comes to childbearing. I personally know couples that are struggling to have kids. But when I speak to them, it’s hard for them to truly open up and be honest. I know it’s tough and it has even caused separation among some couples. Some of these women won’t open up to me because they think I won’t understand since I already have a child. I’ve even notice a sense of jealousy towards me.

I empathized and I don’t take it personal when they look at me and feel jealous; because I was in their same shoes. When I started planning for a family, I thought I wouldn’t be able to conceive. It had been 6 months of trying and each month I felt disappointed and too afraid to admit that perhaps it wouldn’t happen. It seemed like everyone around me was getting pregnant but me and I was jealous. Unfortunately, some women can spend years trying to conceive and nothing. We all have our individual journeys and we all have to hit those bumps on our road. We must stop comparing ourselves, the grass isn’t always greener on the other side.

Among the Latin community, families used to have five, eight, even 10 kids. Now many of us struggle to even have one. And since we come from large families, when it’s our turn to form our own, we assume it will come easy to us. Our family and friends can unknowingly be insensitive to this issue.They constantly ask: when are you going to have a baby and when you have one, when are you having the next one. Some of us feel the pressure of our families, society or even ourselves of forming a family. People ask about having kids but how do you tell them you are trying and can’t? It’s heartbreaking because some of these women suffer in silence. Speaking about our fears won’t solve our issues, but perhaps sharing our stories will at least ease the pain. We are in an era of womanhood and empowerment; but how can we demand equality when we can’t even share our feelings among ourselves?

I know I am blessed and I thank God every day. Do I have tough days? Yes. Can I complain and wish I had 5 minutes to myself? Yes. I can because by complaining about how rough my day was is not equivalent to being ungrateful. It’s expressing my feelings and that is what I encourage women to do. To talk it out and express their anxiety, fear and frustration with conceiving. You would be amazed as to how many of us share the same emotions. And don’t assume that because women have children that their journey was easy. Let’s not be so quick to judge and instead lets embrace and hear each other out.

I am blessed to be a mother and I wish that all women who desire to be a mother, will one day get to experience it.